Hey there. I’ve been thinking about you. Why? Because it’s August. When you get to August, you know summer is in full swing. But that’s soon going to change because after August comes … the beginnings of fall. I know, I know … plenty of time to think about that later. Except that it all happens so fast and it feels like time is an accelerating freight train. For some of you, this may be the bittersweet time of preparing to take your first (or only) kid to college. How can that be?
From the moment you give birth, you know this day will come. It’s a normal path, the rhythm of life. They will return – vacations, summers – but it’s different. This moment is their launching. It’s the first step in building their own lives, which was always the plan. Right? We know this intellectually, but what preparation do we really have for the emotions we’re likely to experience? Now this day is here and you’re realizing that the rhythm of your life is about to feel oddly different. For real. Let’s talk about that.
You’ve had a job title for the last 18 years. MOM. You still have that job title, but the job description will change. Have you written your new one? If you’re anything like I was, I’m guessing it never occurred to you to write a new job description. But you can, you know. You can decide what you want your life to look like going forward. This is quite possibly the first time in your life where you have been unsure of what your days will actually look like. Which brings the next question. Without a new job description, what are you, mom, supposed to do now? Who are you?
Ahhhhhh … now we’re getting down to the core. Down to how it feels. At first you’ll notice a LOT of feelings. Some people might tell you you’re overreacting to those feelings. After all … it’s just college. They’ll be back. Right? Don’t be so quick to listen to the advice of “just snap out of it”. Take a breath here. This is important. It’s a significant place in time in your mom journey. Give yourself a little time to just be with it.
You might notice space. Your space. It’s different. Then you notice more than space – there are gaps. Now what? That pause … a lack of direction. The questions begin. Maybe it’s the sense of being at a fork in the road. Or maybe you can’t exactly put your finger on it. Something feels off. Where do you find answers? I remember being at that place. The asking of “now what?”
If you’re asking questions, you’re on your way to finding answers. Be at ease with this space in your life. You might find comfort in joining a community conversation to explore some of your questions. Maybe a one-on-one conversation with someone who knows a lot of what you’re feeling can be just the right thing.
Heartfelt conversations, personal connections and community are the core of my work in the world. I’d love to hear from you!
Your biggest fan ~
Jean
